Para Perakit

shenzhen
Sumber gambar: i.ytimg.com

Beberapa hari yang lalu, teman saya bercerita tentang salah satu kota di Cina yang menjadi pasar elektronik terbesar di dunia, Shenzen. Katanya, kalau kamu ingin memiliki sebuah iPhone, kamu bisa saja membeli komponen-komponen inti dari ponsel tersebut (baterai, layar, dan lain-lain) dan merakitnya sendiri. Seseorang pernah melakukannya dan berhasil. Biaya yang ia keluarkan tentu lebih murah dibandingkan dengan membeli ponsel yang sudah jadi. Selain itu, ia mendapat kebanggaan tersendiri karena menggunakan karyanya sendiri.

Tentu tidak semua orang seperti itu – mungkin hanya segelintir orang dengan minat khusus yang sudi melakukannya. Sebagian besar orang memilih untuk membeli ponsel jadi karena alasan kepraktisan.

Kemudian tiba-tiba terpikirkan oleh saya, bagaimana kalau hal itu juga terjadi pada manusia ketika mereka memilih teman hidup?

Dalam memilih teman hidup, manusia ingin pasangan yang tepat bagi dirinya. Seseorang yang memiliki tujuan dan nilai-nilai hidup yang sama karena akan sulit untuk menjalani hidup bersama hingga ajal menjemput jika mereka tidak memiliki core value yang sama.

Paling tidak secara kasar manusia dapat dibagi menjadi dua, yaitu manusia yang sedang menata hidupnya dan manusia yang telah mengetahui hal yang ingin dicapainya dan sedang dalam proses meraih hal itu. Butuh waktu dan proses yang berbeda bagi setiap orang untuk menemukan seseorang yang memiliki visi yang sama. Bahkan tidak semua orang sudah tahu tujuan dan nilai hidupnya.

Dalam memilih pasangan hidup, beberapa manusia menginginkan pasangan yang sudah tahu langkah-langkah yang akan ia jalani agar bisa membayangkan dan mengukur apakah manusia ini dapat melihat mereka berdampingan dan saling mendukung tujuan hidup masing-masing di masa depan. Beberapa ingin mencari orang yang sudah sukses, sehingga tidak perlu repot-repot “merakit ponsel” dan bisa langsung “mengoperasikan” saja.

Tidak terbayang jika semua orang ingin yang serba-jadi dan tidak menghargai proses dibalik “produk” kualitas terbaik yang mereka “gunakan” sekarang. Bagaimana nasib orang-orang yang masih menata hidupnya dan membutuhkan bimbingan? Bagaimana nasib ponsel yang masih berupa pecahan-pecahan dari beberapa bagian yang belum dirakit secara utuh jika tidak ada yang mau melakukannya?

Bersyukurlah karena di dunia ini ada para perakit. Mereka adalah orang-orang yang menghargai proses. Mereka adalah orang-orang yang bermata jeli, yang bisa mengenali sesuatu yang berharga, yang mungkin bagi orang lain terlihat tidak berharga karena mereka tidak tahu cara membuatnya menjadi berharga.

Bersyukurlah karena para “perakit” mau membantu membimbing manusia-manusia yang masih bingung akan tujuan hidupnya hingga manusia tersebut mencapai kesuksesan pada akhirnya. Mereka adalah orang-orang terbaik karena mereka rela mencurahkan tenaga, waktu, dan pikiran mereka untuk membantu mengembangkan kapasitas manusia yang sebelumnya tidak lebih dari kepingan-kepingan yang belum utuh. Di dunia yang serba-ingin-cepat dan serba-ingin-semua-ideal, para perakit termasuk spesies langka.

Jika kamu menemukan paling tidak seorang “perakit” di hidupmu, hargailah ia dengan mencoba mengikuti saran yang ia berikan sebelum kamu menentukan jalanmu sendiri. Ia menemukan sesuatu yang berharga di dalam dirimu yang tidak dilihat orang lain dan ia mau membantumu untuk “merakit” hidupmu agar orang lain dapat merasakan kebaikanmu seperti yang ia rasakan. Tidak banyak orang yang mau repot-repot melakukan hal tersebut. Kamu beruntung kalau kamu menemukannya.

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For My Dearest Friend

I dedicate this post to a friend of mine, Rizky Ayu Ryani Putri (as known as Uti), who is always there for me for ten years. I have never met someone who is as patient, brave, and humble as her. I just want to reminisce, if you don’t mind.


I met her when in middle school, first year. We were in the same class and sat in pairs – she always sat in front of me. We and our chair-mates were inseparable.

(Unfortunately both of us don’t contact them anymore because they had been accepted to different high schools; it’s harder to reach them.)

Middle school life is weird, I think. We bullied each other, Uti and I, along with our chair-mates. I applied wet correction pen on my table. Usually when either of those two turned around to face me, she would put her arm on my table and, voila! Her hand would be all fair and white. 😃 We did it all the time when we had nothing to do. Sometimes we watched our seniors, the “popular” ones, playing basketball and we daydreamed we would date them someday. (Never mind it never happens, but at least they knew me – because of the dumbest thing I’ve done and I’d rather not write about it lol.)

Uti was, and maybe is still, the clever one. She was a member of Mathematics club (I mean, Mathematics club?? I would never be a part of it haha) and joined some competition if I’m not mistaken. She has a fantastic voice as well, and joined a student’s choir. I didn’t do any school activities beside classes back then – I either hung out with friends or went straight home.

Years after, we went to the same high school, but we never had a class together. Still, we met each other now and then and caught up a lot. Moreover, we used to hung out often in our last year, three with the other friend. It was nice, when we had nothing to worry besides boring classes, boring teachers, and thinking how we can get good grades while still have much time to hang out. Time flies fast.


Here we are, now in our last year of university. SO many stories – there was good time, bad time, and so-so time. I threw shits. She fucked up. We know each other’s ups and downs – sometimes I don’t even need to explain because she already knows. Sometimes I don’t need to ask because I can tell by seeing her face.

She is a hell of a girl, in a positive way. She’s very humble and kind, yet she can’t see it herself most of the time, makes me want to smack her just to make her realise that she’s that great. She’s brave; willing to sacrifice herself for someone she loves (which is an asshole because he took her for granted). But she’s very patient. Very, really, extremely. She has been dealing with the guy we love but we hate the most for God (and she) knows how long. She’s pure at heart – and she really deserves to be happy for a long time; not a short while like she’s having right now, and currently taken again quickly.

She has been sick for more than a week, now in the hospital near our campus. We still don’t know what’s wrong with her; the doctor is still making some diagnoses to the point when I begin to wonder his credential. I only can hope that all is going to end up well, for her. (But isn’t hope the root of all disappointments?)

God may hate me but please You have to love her, enough to make her happy again. Content, at least. Would you do her one favour?

 

Immersed

She was so immersed in her thoughts.

However, every now and then, she glanced to her right. Someone sat beside her; he had a tall posture, black hair, and almond-shaped eyes. Sometimes he started a conversation with her; sometimes it was her turn to do it first. If they didn’t talk with each other, they would play with their phones or just stare blankly at their surrounding, probably thinking what to talk next.

Once or twice she felt his eyes on her, but she acted like she didn’t know it. She kept her head down, fiddling with her pen. She didn’t want to look like she was interested.

On the rare occasion when they actually talked with each other, she couldn’t resist the urge to look into his dark eyes and his small lips accordingly. His eyes narrowed when he laughed, showing his white teeth. Sometimes he stuck his tongue or even bit his lower lip.

His lip-biting was her weakness. Every time he did that, she couldn’t help but imagining how soft his lips would be like. It was hard for her to not think about being pinned against the wall and kissed by him softly yet passionately at the same time. She had always been curious about how soft his hair would feel like when she raked her hands on his hair. Everything about him made her feel stupid and she wanted to learn more about the subject of him. How come her lecturer never taught her that?

She was so immersed in her thoughts.

My Way

Hi. I’m listening to Frank Sinatra’s My Way. Go listen to that as well!

2016 has been the most emotionally-exhausting year of my life, no kidding. I had ups and downs which were as unpredictable-but-can-be-predicted-as-well as global market charts. On the first half of 2016, I was living nightmares; thankfully life became better and better as months went by.

It was a hell of a year: I jumped into and dragged myself out of that hell with my eyes covered. I love myself for having a courage to jump in, yet I hated myself as well for being blind and stupid. (Note the different use of tenses.) I never regret though; I learn a lot by making mistakes.

However I think 2017 will be exciting! (No, exciting is not a right word. Gotta be more than that!) I am going to try new things like trading, investing, and building a business–things that I have never thought I will be doing before. I am going to travel, work on my final project while doing classes at the same time (yes, I know), and make more money (yeaaah). It’s a year of exploring and creating!

I have explored a lot, but now is the time to give time and effort to do what I like to do since I have nothing to stop me!

Yesterday I met my friends, which consists of 5 people including me, and I felt a peaceful happiness when I listened to their stories about traveling, family, and love life. I also felt, I don’t know, nostalgic? Bittersweet? Because I know that sooner or later we will go our ways, will not see each other that often (even now, not so much), and everything will be different. It is expected to happen, but knowing it will happen doesn’t make me feel any different. This is the transition phase that I am always thinking of: feelings fade, people change. We are going to speak in a different “language” and meet people who speak the same language as each of us.

And that would be very fun! (: We can share a lot more different things, make each other gains new knowledge when we share stories about our new worlds, and be closer than ever because we know we are still the same even though we live a different worlds.

Because, deep down, we know that our ties are stronger than friends. Yes, people come and go, but family stays.

Love,
Aci

Win Your Friends Back!

Time flies, people change. I have had many friends, and lost them too. Very normal, right? That’s life. But, do I really want to just let them go and not doing anything about it? Well, it depends whether they are toxic or not. Even so, I have several ways to win my friends back.

  1. Reach them first and ask how they are doing. Are they good?
  2. Catch up. Tell each other stories and pretend for a moment that everything is okay between us.
  3. Tell the truth about how my friends and I feel toward each other. Be brutally honest. Hurt each other, scratch the wound, and accept it.
  4. Start healing each other’s wound. Be supportive, be forgiving, and be kind. After all my friends and I used to be living life together for a while.
  5. Hug and laugh with them. Joke about the old times and learn something from that together. I never let my past define what I am now. I am the one who choose who I want to be; I am the one who choose myself.
  6. Remember important days, like birthdays, and celebrate it. Or at least congratulate them for it. Every person likes to feel recognised by others.
  7. Catch up with them again randomly. What happens out of the blue are often remembered for a long time that the ones which are not.
  8. The most important thing: I’ll show my true colours. Once again, tell and show the truth throughout the words, the gestures, and everything. I’m about to win my friends back. It’s going to be useless if I’m being fake.
  9. If being with them makes me down or makes me hate myself again, I won’t bother hanging out with them. Why should I? It won’t do me any good. I won’t punch myself too hard anymore when I’m making mistake; there’s no use. And if having them around makes me feel like I’m punched in the gut, why bother?
  10. Mentally prepare to all those things.

Now if you ask: did you do that? Nope, not yet. Will you do that? Maybe yes, maybe no. I don’t know yet. Having friends around is fun, but being alone is fun too. Besides, it’s perfectly normal to lose friends because, eventually, my way of thinking will be different from my old friends. I will make new ones (and already did), who have the same goals or interests as I do. I’m going through that transition, when all my friends are now reaching their dreams. I’m doing that as well.

Losing friends is okay.
Winning them back is awesome.
Separating my way with theirs while knowing we are all running toward our own version of happiness is perfectly heart-fulfilling.